It’s the big day! You’re all on the big bed of the bridal suite, with matching robes. Your hair and makeup is complete, photographer has just arrived and it’s time to give the bride her wedding day card + gift!

But wait, you didn’t know you needed to get the bride a gift!! One by one the other maids, perk up and pass along the present and you are sinking into your silk at the idea of not having something to celebrate the bride with! After all, you bought a flight to come here, the jewelry, the dress, the hair, the makeup, thinking about it, didn’t you some how foot the bill for those cocktails after the rehearsal dinner?

So what IS protocol for gifts when you’re in the bridal party? We’re talking about it!

Traditionally this is how it goes:

They meet.

Theres a ring.

Theres a yes.

Theres a wedding planned.

They ask you to be involved.

You say yes, and then…


When she presented you with your “Will You Be My Bridesmaid Gift” you probably thought you were saying yes to standing by her, taking  photos, maybe saying a speech, but what you didn’t say yes to was the bottom line. The bill. The mooooolaaaa that a wedding adds up to.

From bridal shower presents, engagement gifts, the dress,the shoes (they are pretty incredible though-def wearing those again), there is a lot to purchase. So when do you gift and when do you skip?

We say, it’s up to you!! Find a price you are comfortable spending on presents for this wedding, then either buy one big present traditionally given at the bridal shower, or separate it into multiples!

Maybe you are looking to stay around $100 that means you can either separate it and make a kitchen basket with spatulas, kitchen towels + a garlic press ($25) for the shower, a new bra set for the bachelorette party ($50) and a sweet Alex + Ani for the wedding day ($25) OR you can put all $100 into that Keurig she’s been wanting!

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Whatever the case is, there is no right or wrong for gift giving, but we do suggest having a card or two handy, there’s never enough of these to go around! A personalized message can sometimes mean more than anything you could buy.

And remember, she picked you to stand by her because of the connection you two share, a toaster can’t beat that!

Thank you to M Harris Studios for this beautiful picture of Marissa with her ladies at Walden Hall